A bitter sweet day

October 20....this day holds a lot of memories for me. It is the birthday of my kids great grandma. Grandma V was one of the sweetest, kindest ladies I've known. She raised six kids, buried one and was a farmers wife so she knew how to work. Her kids were ornery, and still are. She loved her kids, grandkids and great grandkids-she was my first and only experience with a grandparent which I inherited when I got married-she became my grandma too! She was a sweet, sweet lady. They played the song Edelweiss at her funeral-I think of her every time I hear that song and it could not have been a more fitting song for her.

This day is also filled with sadness-29 years ago today I miscarried my first baby. This is a heartache you never forget. I got to see that baby, tiny and small. I wonder and think about that little person, who never had a chance to live. I wonder what he or she would have grown up to be like? Would they have had red hair? But on this exact same day, a year after loosing that baby, I found out I was pregnant again and this time things went as planned. That baby was born, grew up and is my oldest son! There is nothing like the thrill of finding out you are pregnant but one of the worse feelings in this world is coming home from the hospital without that baby.

This day holds sadness for the community I live in as two young men were tragically killed in auto accidents on this day two years apart. Families are still healing and dealing with these losses.

I've sat with a friend and listened and shed a few tears today as she is having her dog put to sleep because of health reasons.

It amazes me how a day or date can generate so many feelings.  So here is today. A day filled with sad and sweet memories. It's all part of living and life.