Lately I've been having a really hard time seeing the blessings in my life not just ones in general but the daily blessings for that matter.. It seems like for all the wonderful and good things going on there is a dark cloud of some kind that rains on my parade. And you know what I'm tired of it. Sick and tired of it. I know there are rough times in life.
I try to choose to see the glass half full rather than half empty most days. But honestly lately it seems like that damn glass is completely empty, not even half full or empty. I know this is part of a bigger plan and is just life. And we are not in control, just along for the ride. But at some point I'd like to have some smooth, uneventful road to travel on while on this ride. I'm tired and I don't think I'm asking too much here.
I also keep reminding myself (many, many times a day) that God is not going to give me anything that HE and I can't handle together. But I think God must think one or all of the following... A) need a kick in the ass for whatever reason B) to learn some life lesson here or C ) I'm a bad ass who can handle all the crap that I seem to be "blessed" with. I'd like to hope it is option C, but honestly I'm approaching things lately with the perspective that it probably is all three. Okay God I get that, I'm trying here, but could you cut me some slack, please.
But when bad things happen to good people, I mean really, really good people, I can't help but wonder why. Or in my case, what the hell is going on here? Why? Why? Why? Now I'm not trying to wish bad things on anyone, good, bad or otherwise. There are only a couple of people in this world that I would not care if a house fell on them and I'm sure there are people in this world who feel the same way about me, it's life. And I hope it is just a couple of people, not a majority.
Some of my greatest blessings:
my family
my friends
the roof over my head and food on the table
my health (even with the challenges I've been given and I try to take care of this body, it's the only one I get)
I appreciate the ability to see a sunrise and the beauty of nature
I have a job to go to
I have some God given talents and abilities that I try to use to make this world a little bit better
I have aches and pains but I can feel them and I can swing my legs over the side of the bed each day
I am blessed in a million other ways each day...I know this
Have I mentioned my family as one of my blessings...no matter how wacky or how irritated we may get with each other, they are who God has put in our lives, for whatever reason. These are the people we've fought with as a kid or have raised to be great adults or call when we are missing our mom and dad. They are our roots and the people we started with when we came into the world. And no matter what happens or how irritated or annoying or frustrating we may get with them, they are family. So when something happens within my family it hits me too. We are in this together.
A third cancer diagnoses within my circle of family and friends within the past 10 months has me reeling-big time. I literally feel like I've been knocked on my butt. In the past I've gotten back up after getting the news and have been ready to help these loved ones kick some cancer butt. From words of support to prayer, I've been a cheerleader, whether they know it or not I've been in their corner ready to help them fight the fight. But this latest news has me feeling like I'm still sitting on the ground looking up and wondering what is going on. I'm asking what just happened here and WHY?
So as I try to wrap my brain around this latest diagnosis I need to refocus and put my energy back into to the blessings of life and get back on my feet. I need to get the pom poms out and the boxing gloves on ready to help fight this fight-if you mess with one you get the whole kit and kaboodle. And this too is a blessing. This is a life leaning lesson. This is life. We are all in this fight together regardless of what it is we are fighting. And honestly, and this sounds really odd, but this cancer is a blessing in some way, shape and form. It may heal old wounds, or bring people closer together who have drifted apart or it may bring even more memories that someday we will treasure. No one knows what is ahead on this journey. Life is taking the good with the bad blessings (yes there are bad blessings, they are usually called lessons) and making them all part of the big picture and not loosing perspective but seeing the blessings.
Thursday, August 18, 2016
Sunday, August 14, 2016
Keeping in check
The past three weeks have been crazy busy. And to be honest I don't feel like I had much of a summer, but that's life. It is better than having too much time on my hands, which I hate. Too much sleep and too much time on my hands is not good, at least for me it is not.
It amazes me how quick things can change...one minute you are celebrating a life event, a milestone and the next minute God gives us a challenge or test that makes you double check life. It has been a reminder to appreciate what you have and maybe rethink your priorities.
I helped celebrate a life milestone for my sister last weekend. The event and celebration were amazing. It brought back tons of memories from my childhood, and to say I was proud and happy for my sister is an understatement. It was the celebration of my sister and her commitment, that made it worth the trip.
But God gave my family a check of reality (again, for the second time this year) this past week and it has put things in perspective, but I thought we had them in perspective. Reality sucks sometimes. No matter what I do the phrase "why do bad things happen to good people?" keeps coming to mind for me.
I am trying to find faith and comfort in the fact that God has this. Putting it in his hands. But it has been in his hands all along. I know that he does not give us anything that HE and I can handle together. "Have faith," I keep telling myself. But I swing from panic to prayer to anger back to keeping the faith. I wish I could turn back time to a week ago, but time marches on.
Sometimes we are given news that literally knocks us on our butt. For the second time this year, I find myself picking myself up off the ground and trying to grasp the news.
But for now, I will wait and see what tests tell us and what God has planned for our lives. It seems like life is far from dull and routine lately and why it's like that I don't have all the answers. But it's life and whatever it is God is trying to tell us I'm going to try to pay attention so I understand or at least get the message.
Appreciate the moments, not matter how big or small they are. Life goes by fast and changes in the blink of an eye. Be sure to say "I love you" to the people that you love because no one is guaranteed to be here at the end of the day, next week or a year from now. As the saying goes "Life is fragile, handle with prayer".
It amazes me how quick things can change...one minute you are celebrating a life event, a milestone and the next minute God gives us a challenge or test that makes you double check life. It has been a reminder to appreciate what you have and maybe rethink your priorities.
I helped celebrate a life milestone for my sister last weekend. The event and celebration were amazing. It brought back tons of memories from my childhood, and to say I was proud and happy for my sister is an understatement. It was the celebration of my sister and her commitment, that made it worth the trip.
But God gave my family a check of reality (again, for the second time this year) this past week and it has put things in perspective, but I thought we had them in perspective. Reality sucks sometimes. No matter what I do the phrase "why do bad things happen to good people?" keeps coming to mind for me.
I am trying to find faith and comfort in the fact that God has this. Putting it in his hands. But it has been in his hands all along. I know that he does not give us anything that HE and I can handle together. "Have faith," I keep telling myself. But I swing from panic to prayer to anger back to keeping the faith. I wish I could turn back time to a week ago, but time marches on.
Sometimes we are given news that literally knocks us on our butt. For the second time this year, I find myself picking myself up off the ground and trying to grasp the news.
But for now, I will wait and see what tests tell us and what God has planned for our lives. It seems like life is far from dull and routine lately and why it's like that I don't have all the answers. But it's life and whatever it is God is trying to tell us I'm going to try to pay attention so I understand or at least get the message.
Appreciate the moments, not matter how big or small they are. Life goes by fast and changes in the blink of an eye. Be sure to say "I love you" to the people that you love because no one is guaranteed to be here at the end of the day, next week or a year from now. As the saying goes "Life is fragile, handle with prayer".
Monday, July 25, 2016
If you can't say anything nice...
It has been a while since I've blogged and I have a good excuse, one word....wedding. That's my excuse and I'm stickin' to it! It's not that I haven't felt the need to write or had material, just lack of time!
On this, the day after the first wedding of our year, I've had a million things running through my head. Happy thoughts and memories, the fun, the laughter, the smiles and the tears! And the best way to sum it all up is also with one word, "wonderful"!
But each year whenever graduation time, wedding season or whatever is going on is an "invitation" issue. Who is invited. Who is not. Who TO invite and who NOT to invite. It's a win-loose battle!
Yes there are those people who invite everyone they know or feel like they have to invite (your ex-brother in-law's sisters boyfriend-unless you are really close!). Then there are those who invite the people who they value, who have touched or brought meaning to their life, the ones who they are close to and have made a positive impact on. Or because you are related and to keep peace in the family. I have to admit I am not offended when I am not invited to something. It used to bother me, but honestly some people are such putz's that I am kind of relieved not to be included in their "event". Yes I have sent cards and gifts to people who I want to let them know I care, but I wasn't invited to their event. It is not going to stop me from sending a gift if I want to! Don't get me wrong, I am thrilled to be invited to an event, when it is someone who means a lot to me. BUT....inviting people to an event just to invite them is just dumb.
My theory is if you have not had a positive affect or impact on my life or if I have not heard from you in the past year or more then I'm not including you in my "party". If you have burned me, or been a jerk-your not worth my time or effort. If you are only are my friend when we see each other or you want attention or it works for you-your not invited. Yes I get the friends you many not talk to for weeks, months or years and when you see each other you pick up right where you left off the last time you saw one another-I have a couple of friends like that. But my theory is if you have not returned any effort to stay in touch, except when you happen to run into me then your not invite worthy. And there are also other factors....venue size, cost, or maybe it is just a small gathering. Maybe it's not my call on the guest list. But some people don't think about anyone but themselves. And everyone and their dog does not need to be invited!
I've been in those situations where I've been with other people who were invited or part of something that I was not. And when they talk about it socially when I'm around I either listen or ask questions to be a part of the conversation. I get it, I wasn't invited for whatever reason. Life goes on, my world did not stop revolving!
My whole purpose for this blog is to address the self-centered people who get offended and they say things or post snarky, crappy, immature things on social media. Here are my points on the whole situation: 1. Nice that you say those kinds of things on social media...way to hide behind a keyboard and a screen. 2. It shows your true character. Yep, people comment about it and wonder what the hell is wrong with you.They are judging YOU not the fact that you were not invited to a social gathering 3. Way to be a dark cloud on someone else's special time and occasion-very mature-no you're not. 4. I'm sorry that life is not centered around or all about you. But it is not my problem. 5. This is a reminder of maybe WHY you were not invited...I'm just making a point.
With this first wedding there were people I would not have invited, (mainly family!). But not my final call. Life goes on and no harm was done. This was NOT my party or place to have a final say. But to the individual who had to post something snarky on social media it truly showed your true colors.
There will always be "those" people, I get that. But I was always told "if you can't say anything nice then don't say anything at all". If the world would follow this guideline a little more it would be a lot better place or maybe the people who think they should be included need to follow this a lot more.
Okay that is off my mind! I can't wait for weddings #2 and #3. Bring them on! I'm ready!
On this, the day after the first wedding of our year, I've had a million things running through my head. Happy thoughts and memories, the fun, the laughter, the smiles and the tears! And the best way to sum it all up is also with one word, "wonderful"!
But each year whenever graduation time, wedding season or whatever is going on is an "invitation" issue. Who is invited. Who is not. Who TO invite and who NOT to invite. It's a win-loose battle!
Yes there are those people who invite everyone they know or feel like they have to invite (your ex-brother in-law's sisters boyfriend-unless you are really close!). Then there are those who invite the people who they value, who have touched or brought meaning to their life, the ones who they are close to and have made a positive impact on. Or because you are related and to keep peace in the family. I have to admit I am not offended when I am not invited to something. It used to bother me, but honestly some people are such putz's that I am kind of relieved not to be included in their "event". Yes I have sent cards and gifts to people who I want to let them know I care, but I wasn't invited to their event. It is not going to stop me from sending a gift if I want to! Don't get me wrong, I am thrilled to be invited to an event, when it is someone who means a lot to me. BUT....inviting people to an event just to invite them is just dumb.
My theory is if you have not had a positive affect or impact on my life or if I have not heard from you in the past year or more then I'm not including you in my "party". If you have burned me, or been a jerk-your not worth my time or effort. If you are only are my friend when we see each other or you want attention or it works for you-your not invited. Yes I get the friends you many not talk to for weeks, months or years and when you see each other you pick up right where you left off the last time you saw one another-I have a couple of friends like that. But my theory is if you have not returned any effort to stay in touch, except when you happen to run into me then your not invite worthy. And there are also other factors....venue size, cost, or maybe it is just a small gathering. Maybe it's not my call on the guest list. But some people don't think about anyone but themselves. And everyone and their dog does not need to be invited!
I've been in those situations where I've been with other people who were invited or part of something that I was not. And when they talk about it socially when I'm around I either listen or ask questions to be a part of the conversation. I get it, I wasn't invited for whatever reason. Life goes on, my world did not stop revolving!
My whole purpose for this blog is to address the self-centered people who get offended and they say things or post snarky, crappy, immature things on social media. Here are my points on the whole situation: 1. Nice that you say those kinds of things on social media...way to hide behind a keyboard and a screen. 2. It shows your true character. Yep, people comment about it and wonder what the hell is wrong with you.They are judging YOU not the fact that you were not invited to a social gathering 3. Way to be a dark cloud on someone else's special time and occasion-very mature-no you're not. 4. I'm sorry that life is not centered around or all about you. But it is not my problem. 5. This is a reminder of maybe WHY you were not invited...I'm just making a point.
With this first wedding there were people I would not have invited, (mainly family!). But not my final call. Life goes on and no harm was done. This was NOT my party or place to have a final say. But to the individual who had to post something snarky on social media it truly showed your true colors.
There will always be "those" people, I get that. But I was always told "if you can't say anything nice then don't say anything at all". If the world would follow this guideline a little more it would be a lot better place or maybe the people who think they should be included need to follow this a lot more.
Okay that is off my mind! I can't wait for weddings #2 and #3. Bring them on! I'm ready!
Wednesday, June 29, 2016
When you can't breathe or going up a mountain
While in Colorado this past weekend our fun and loving hosts took us on a hike....up a mountain....to the most gorgeous lake! It was a blast and so beautiful to see. Plus while visiting this mountain lake in the Rocky Mountains our hosts arranged for an elk to make an appearance and entertain us while sitting along the lake, it was great timing! It was so cool and a wonderful experience. But it literally was cool...going up the temp dropped so it was ideal for hiking. And the snow melt made the clear lake water (Mills Lake) very cold.
But I had the same experience last year as I did this year when hiking in Colorado, I struggled to start out with breathing and altitude (not attitude, altitude!). Working out three miles a day I thought I'd be in better shape. I was struggling with the breathing and wondering a couple of times if running on the flat parts would help or if I should have stayed home! Yes, one extreme to another in my thought process there.
But about a half mile up my body figured out the altitude thing and I didn't find myself with a tight chest or struggling to breath any longer. From there on the only thing taking my breath away was the sights. The river, rapids, wildlife and waterfalls. The scenery and the ability to see for miles was awesome.
It is interesting the thoughts that go through your mind when you are out with nature, as did mine on Sunday. I rehashed some problems, trying to come up with solutions or better scenarios, I wondered about some things and people (it had been a busy and trying week), why they are they way they are, and I prayed for people who I knew needed prayers because I was in a peaceful and beautiful place, and I had a front row seat to God's handy work. Also, I didn't want to face plant and go head first in front of God and everyone! I appreciated where I was at that moment and how blessed I am.
Honestly coming down the trail was harder than going up. The incline, keeping your footing and not tripping or sliding were challenges but it was okay-we lived to tell! And best of all nothing hurt the next day. The exhilarated feeling was worth every step, which ended up being over 14,000 steps and 101 flights of steps.
If I lived there I would be exploring the mountains, trails and lakes every weekend. So beautiful!
So despite the fact that breathing was a struggle for a time, I lived and I'm ready for the next hike up a mountain. And I'm betting I'll struggle with the altitude on that one too!
Keep climbing those mountains!
Friday, June 24, 2016
The things you see while driving across Nebraska
...or my trip to Colorado, today!
I'm on the road today. Actually being driven, for now until my driver gives up her turn! I honestly would not be driving and typing this. The laptop gets in the way!!
So for entertainment purposes only and absolutely nothing against the state of Nebraska here is what we have seen, so far!
-A semi full of cattle that was spraying shit, literally, on our windshield. Obviously the cows were nervous. And we now smell lovely! The smell of money as my dad always said.
-We seem to be very popular as there is a lot of traffic!
-Unfortunately, unlike last year, there is no flooding for our entertainment purposes! Last year it was like the entire state was a lake and I-80 went across this enormous lake called Nebraska.
-So far no "breaks", if you know what I mean...liquid intake has been kept to a minimum.
-The rumble strips along the side of the road not only help keep you awake but when the semi in front of us keeps driving on them it makes you wonder what the heck is up with the driver? Maybe he needs a nap?
-So far our diet has consisted of party mix, water and gatorade (aka migraine relief for me) and baby carrots. Healthy!!
-I've played secretary and scheduled a bridal dress fitting for next week for my pilot (bride).
-We are about to go back in time here shortly....when we go into mountain time. I hope we gain a good hour, one that is fun and that we like!! : )
-Like my dad I have kept an eye on the crops and livestock. Yep they are all there, green and mooing!
Ummmm that's about it, for now, "pretty boring" according to my driver and we are about to stop and switch to a new driver! Me!!!!
It's Boulder or bust for us. Man I hope nothing busts! But here's to safe travels and no more livestock trucks with nervous cattle!!
Happy Friday! Watch out Colorado!
I'm on the road today. Actually being driven, for now until my driver gives up her turn! I honestly would not be driving and typing this. The laptop gets in the way!!
So for entertainment purposes only and absolutely nothing against the state of Nebraska here is what we have seen, so far!
-A semi full of cattle that was spraying shit, literally, on our windshield. Obviously the cows were nervous. And we now smell lovely! The smell of money as my dad always said.
-We seem to be very popular as there is a lot of traffic!
-Unfortunately, unlike last year, there is no flooding for our entertainment purposes! Last year it was like the entire state was a lake and I-80 went across this enormous lake called Nebraska.
-So far no "breaks", if you know what I mean...liquid intake has been kept to a minimum.
-The rumble strips along the side of the road not only help keep you awake but when the semi in front of us keeps driving on them it makes you wonder what the heck is up with the driver? Maybe he needs a nap?
-So far our diet has consisted of party mix, water and gatorade (aka migraine relief for me) and baby carrots. Healthy!!
-I've played secretary and scheduled a bridal dress fitting for next week for my pilot (bride).
-We are about to go back in time here shortly....when we go into mountain time. I hope we gain a good hour, one that is fun and that we like!! : )
-Like my dad I have kept an eye on the crops and livestock. Yep they are all there, green and mooing!
Ummmm that's about it, for now, "pretty boring" according to my driver and we are about to stop and switch to a new driver! Me!!!!
It's Boulder or bust for us. Man I hope nothing busts! But here's to safe travels and no more livestock trucks with nervous cattle!!
Happy Friday! Watch out Colorado!
Thursday, June 23, 2016
Good intentions gone bad
As someone who works with kids, I've seen a great deal from the funny and humorous to the sad and heartbreaking. I could write a book. But after 20+ years of coaching both boys and girls I am seeing a trend at all levels but more so at the high school level that leaves me angry, upset and baffled. And honestly, at times I find myself losing my love of sports because of it.
Most parents of kids who are out for sports have good intentions. The skills, interaction, and life long lessons are endless when it comes to sports. But we have parents who know it all, and only want their child to shine on a team of many. This kind of thinking trickles down to their child and has adverse effects on the team mentality and success. Just one player or their parents can ruin a team. In addition, parents think they have a license to go personally one-on-one with coaches to tell them how or ask why their kid is not....playing or starting or whatever they deem their child is not getting. These parents are bashing and bitching from "why aren't you playing my kid" to "this is what you should be doing" kind of thing. It is common for a coach to not only have to deal with kids, coaching, the day-to-day duties of coaching at a very poorly paid job to now being bashed and yelled at by parents, some who only what their child to shine, some who've never played a day of the sport or any sports for that matter. And to top it off administration seldom, if ever has the back of the coaches anymore. It has become a "bury your head in the sand mentality" for a lot of administrators, support is little, if any most days. The coaches are fresh meat for parents who want it all to be all about their child.
As a coach, I will admit I've lost my love of the sport I coach, a lot lately. I wonder if I should call it quits and move on some days. The passion is not there like I feel it should be. I've dealt with some pretty bad situations over the years and more so recently and had to deal with situations without support or guidance from administration. ZERO support. But there are the little things that bring me back. The success. The lessons I teach, not just about the sport but about life. The smiles and excitement my kids bring to practices and performances. It brings me back and reminds me why I do what I do. It certainly is not for the pay which is pennies on the hour. Pay has never been a reason. The kids and my passion are why I continue.
As a parent, I have watched with a frustrated and heavy heart at times as one player or a parent have made it difficult or worse yet, ruin it for the team. The player who only is looking in the stands for the attention and approval or to see what "Daddy Coach" is telling them to do...really, I've witnessed this kind of garbage, many times! I've listened to my spouse coach both from the sidelines and the stands and make it twice as hard on my kids because if he did showed any kind of favoritism others would be calling and complaining "he/she is the coaches son/daughter" is a favorite excuse and I've heard it over the years, many times as a parent, spouse and coach. (And I won't deny that there are those coaches who have shown favoritism to their own kids when more talented athletes have sat on the bench, they make it harder than hell on the rest of us and our kids. But that is a whole other blog!). Heaven forbid anyone would think for a moment my kids would be working their ass off or have the benefit of having parents who coach to help and guide them! We played with our kids, from football to golf to baseball, to running over their own makeshift hurdles down our driveway. Or yet maybe my kids were OUTSIDE or in the gym playing sports all year long, getting better, working hard, getting stronger and just plain being kids. My kids were not sitting on their butt inside watching tv or hooked up to electronic devices. Nope, that did not happen in my house. Thankfully to those dumb ass parents who thought for sure my son was called up a level in little kids baseball because his dad was the high school coach my child, (all three of them) is now a hardworking, well educated, successful person. He's not living in his hometown working a minimal job and the umbilical cord is not stretched 30 miles from mommy, it is cut! All of my kids have learned the hard way from the stupidity of parents who thought their child was special, gifted or more talented than someone else on the team. Hard work pays off and these parents are not going to be there when junior does not get a job or gets fired from a job because he does not work or do as he is told.
All the money in the world or complaining to the administration or bashing a coach either behind their back from the stands or to in their face does not make your child a star athlete or give them the right to play before someone else who works harder, is coachable and has talent. Instead, it shows your true LACK character and maturity as the adult in this situation.
So on the days when I feel like the society is going to hell in a handbasket and people with money or bigger mouths or who complain the most bring me down I have to remember the benefits of sports and the lifelong lessons it teaches our youth under the guidance of coaches who a) know what they are doing, b) have good intentions to see everyone learn and wins are not the only sign of success.
All the talent in the world is a waste if you do not work. As that quote goes "Hard work beats talent when talent doesn't work hard" True every single day from the baseball field to the gym to the classroom to the workforce and life in general.
Most parents of kids who are out for sports have good intentions. The skills, interaction, and life long lessons are endless when it comes to sports. But we have parents who know it all, and only want their child to shine on a team of many. This kind of thinking trickles down to their child and has adverse effects on the team mentality and success. Just one player or their parents can ruin a team. In addition, parents think they have a license to go personally one-on-one with coaches to tell them how or ask why their kid is not....playing or starting or whatever they deem their child is not getting. These parents are bashing and bitching from "why aren't you playing my kid" to "this is what you should be doing" kind of thing. It is common for a coach to not only have to deal with kids, coaching, the day-to-day duties of coaching at a very poorly paid job to now being bashed and yelled at by parents, some who only what their child to shine, some who've never played a day of the sport or any sports for that matter. And to top it off administration seldom, if ever has the back of the coaches anymore. It has become a "bury your head in the sand mentality" for a lot of administrators, support is little, if any most days. The coaches are fresh meat for parents who want it all to be all about their child.
As a coach, I will admit I've lost my love of the sport I coach, a lot lately. I wonder if I should call it quits and move on some days. The passion is not there like I feel it should be. I've dealt with some pretty bad situations over the years and more so recently and had to deal with situations without support or guidance from administration. ZERO support. But there are the little things that bring me back. The success. The lessons I teach, not just about the sport but about life. The smiles and excitement my kids bring to practices and performances. It brings me back and reminds me why I do what I do. It certainly is not for the pay which is pennies on the hour. Pay has never been a reason. The kids and my passion are why I continue.
As a parent, I have watched with a frustrated and heavy heart at times as one player or a parent have made it difficult or worse yet, ruin it for the team. The player who only is looking in the stands for the attention and approval or to see what "Daddy Coach" is telling them to do...really, I've witnessed this kind of garbage, many times! I've listened to my spouse coach both from the sidelines and the stands and make it twice as hard on my kids because if he did showed any kind of favoritism others would be calling and complaining "he/she is the coaches son/daughter" is a favorite excuse and I've heard it over the years, many times as a parent, spouse and coach. (And I won't deny that there are those coaches who have shown favoritism to their own kids when more talented athletes have sat on the bench, they make it harder than hell on the rest of us and our kids. But that is a whole other blog!). Heaven forbid anyone would think for a moment my kids would be working their ass off or have the benefit of having parents who coach to help and guide them! We played with our kids, from football to golf to baseball, to running over their own makeshift hurdles down our driveway. Or yet maybe my kids were OUTSIDE or in the gym playing sports all year long, getting better, working hard, getting stronger and just plain being kids. My kids were not sitting on their butt inside watching tv or hooked up to electronic devices. Nope, that did not happen in my house. Thankfully to those dumb ass parents who thought for sure my son was called up a level in little kids baseball because his dad was the high school coach my child, (all three of them) is now a hardworking, well educated, successful person. He's not living in his hometown working a minimal job and the umbilical cord is not stretched 30 miles from mommy, it is cut! All of my kids have learned the hard way from the stupidity of parents who thought their child was special, gifted or more talented than someone else on the team. Hard work pays off and these parents are not going to be there when junior does not get a job or gets fired from a job because he does not work or do as he is told.
All the money in the world or complaining to the administration or bashing a coach either behind their back from the stands or to in their face does not make your child a star athlete or give them the right to play before someone else who works harder, is coachable and has talent. Instead, it shows your true LACK character and maturity as the adult in this situation.
So on the days when I feel like the society is going to hell in a handbasket and people with money or bigger mouths or who complain the most bring me down I have to remember the benefits of sports and the lifelong lessons it teaches our youth under the guidance of coaches who a) know what they are doing, b) have good intentions to see everyone learn and wins are not the only sign of success.
All the talent in the world is a waste if you do not work. As that quote goes "Hard work beats talent when talent doesn't work hard" True every single day from the baseball field to the gym to the classroom to the workforce and life in general.
Tuesday, June 14, 2016
Four years ago
Four years ago today I had a life changing experience. My first, ever, major surgery. That surgery had been planned for a couple of months. My mom had just passed away the month before to the day. I was dealing with that loss. But surgery was a must for me. Pre-surgery tests had shown that things looked to be benign but my tumors needed to come out regardless.
I second guessed myself the night before and even the morning of the surgery when the anesthesiologist told me I was the most healthy pre-op patient he had seen. Why was I here? I kept asking myself. Yes, I was scared. Who wouldn't be?
After running a 5K back in October I remember laying in bed that evening feeling a hard lump in my abdomen. I was a bit concerned but just put it in the back of my mind. The new year brought changes in my mom's health and things were declining. A friend was diagnosed with ovarian cancer in early February and I made a physical appointment with my doctor to see what was going on inside of me the day after hearing of this friend.
A routine physical was anything but routine. After describing what I felt, my doctor also felt the same thing I did. Appointments were made immediately for the next day for tests which was more than unnerving. The last time I'd had an ultrasound was when I was pregnant. This time, as I laid on the table and watch the tech begin to click and label I knew something was not right. I asked the tech what she was seeing, she hesitated and finally said she was seeing multiple tumors. When asked how many she said she stopped counting and labeling around 12...
Next was blood tests to see if it was any indicator of what was going on. An appointment with my doctor confirmed that things were not normal. An immediate appointment with an OBGYN in the same building gave me more info as to what was going on.
My decision was to go to an OBGYN in Des Moines to take things further, one who had dealt with cancer, and get things checked out. I choose one and endured a biopsy appointment which was similar in the pain department to giving birth! Tests from the samples did not indicate cancer but still not a for sure answer.
So on this day four years ago I underwent surgery....one tumor was inside an internal organ and instead of weighing 2-3 oz it weighted 3 lbs. That large tumor along with an estimated 16 other tumors that day and roughly 10 lbs in all when all was said and done were removed. I had affectionally named the tumors "Benny and the Jets" from the Elton John song.
Recovery was like nothing I had ever experienced. It was rough. And honestly took me around a year before I would feel back to normal.
But what Benny and the Jets taught me is immersible:
-Take care of your body. It is the only one you get. If you don't take care of it, no one else will.
-A whole new respect for women who have c-sections then brings home a baby. Wow! (I left Benny and the rest at the hospital.)
-A lot more people care and love you than you ever realize. If losing a loved one is not enough to prove that, then major surgery will! Remember this when you are feeling down or lonely.
-Listen to your body. It is constantly telling you things like when it is hungry, thirsty or tired, hurting or things are not right, along with a host of other things. You are it's owner, listen and take care of it.
I still have a scar as proof of my battle with Benny and the Jets. It is a reminder that I am a survivor and life is a daily gift. I was so blessed that things turned out they way they did and I did not have to heal from that major surgery while doing treatments. A day does not go by that that scar does not remind me of how lucky I am. Not a day.
So on this 4-year anniversary, I find myself feeling very blessed and fortunate. I know for some people having surgery today they didn't get the good new and results that I did. Life is an adventure and a constant ride of twists and turns-hang on! God has a plan for everything. Value each and every day.
I second guessed myself the night before and even the morning of the surgery when the anesthesiologist told me I was the most healthy pre-op patient he had seen. Why was I here? I kept asking myself. Yes, I was scared. Who wouldn't be?
After running a 5K back in October I remember laying in bed that evening feeling a hard lump in my abdomen. I was a bit concerned but just put it in the back of my mind. The new year brought changes in my mom's health and things were declining. A friend was diagnosed with ovarian cancer in early February and I made a physical appointment with my doctor to see what was going on inside of me the day after hearing of this friend.
A routine physical was anything but routine. After describing what I felt, my doctor also felt the same thing I did. Appointments were made immediately for the next day for tests which was more than unnerving. The last time I'd had an ultrasound was when I was pregnant. This time, as I laid on the table and watch the tech begin to click and label I knew something was not right. I asked the tech what she was seeing, she hesitated and finally said she was seeing multiple tumors. When asked how many she said she stopped counting and labeling around 12...
Next was blood tests to see if it was any indicator of what was going on. An appointment with my doctor confirmed that things were not normal. An immediate appointment with an OBGYN in the same building gave me more info as to what was going on.
My decision was to go to an OBGYN in Des Moines to take things further, one who had dealt with cancer, and get things checked out. I choose one and endured a biopsy appointment which was similar in the pain department to giving birth! Tests from the samples did not indicate cancer but still not a for sure answer.
So on this day four years ago I underwent surgery....one tumor was inside an internal organ and instead of weighing 2-3 oz it weighted 3 lbs. That large tumor along with an estimated 16 other tumors that day and roughly 10 lbs in all when all was said and done were removed. I had affectionally named the tumors "Benny and the Jets" from the Elton John song.
Recovery was like nothing I had ever experienced. It was rough. And honestly took me around a year before I would feel back to normal.
But what Benny and the Jets taught me is immersible:
-Take care of your body. It is the only one you get. If you don't take care of it, no one else will.
-A whole new respect for women who have c-sections then brings home a baby. Wow! (I left Benny and the rest at the hospital.)
-A lot more people care and love you than you ever realize. If losing a loved one is not enough to prove that, then major surgery will! Remember this when you are feeling down or lonely.
-Listen to your body. It is constantly telling you things like when it is hungry, thirsty or tired, hurting or things are not right, along with a host of other things. You are it's owner, listen and take care of it.
I still have a scar as proof of my battle with Benny and the Jets. It is a reminder that I am a survivor and life is a daily gift. I was so blessed that things turned out they way they did and I did not have to heal from that major surgery while doing treatments. A day does not go by that that scar does not remind me of how lucky I am. Not a day.
So on this 4-year anniversary, I find myself feeling very blessed and fortunate. I know for some people having surgery today they didn't get the good new and results that I did. Life is an adventure and a constant ride of twists and turns-hang on! God has a plan for everything. Value each and every day.
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