Don't judge me

I have a friend, who was having a bad day yesterday but she ask me if I was okay when we saw each other? This friend just got through the one year anniversary of her husband passing away and is still going through some emotions and tough times dealing with this. She is spending this weekend with her mom and sisters on a road trip to attend the graduation of one of her sisters and is not looking forward to the trip, the time with family nor being away from home which is the only place she wants to be right now. My friend seemed very discontent and unhappy when we saw each other and talked. So when she asked me "how I was?" I was rather surprised by her question. She then added that she was wondering by my posts that I put on social media. Really? Do you think everything I post pertains to me or someone else in particular? Nope!

I'm a quote junkie-big time! I like to be motivated. My phone's camera roll is filled with pictures of quotes that I like on a cool background. So for my friend to say this to me kind of surprised me. So I took the time today to look back at my posts, most are photos with quotes or articles that I've shared over the past month or so. I like to be motivated, plain and simple. I also like to support causes that deserve to be supported. One of my biggest causes to support is women. Women are not treated right in this day and age, YET. I work at a place where women are treated as second behind any male in the building. And if you are support staff in addition to being female....well I'll just say it's pretty poor. We have the "good ole' boys club" back in the building which is sad, to say the least. But my goal is to help women understand that they should NOT be treated like this and if ONE female recognizes herself in something I post and it helps her have a better day, become a better person then I don't care. If it's a good cause or something that I believe in then I'll share it, post it and hope someone else gets something out of it as well. But really, do you think my posts are all about me? So all the sports posts I share mean I am a parent of an athlete, I used to be. Or that I coach at the college or professional level-nope. Or that society is pretty screwed up when it comes to our kids participating in extra curricular-yep, it is. I can't change it alone nor will it change in one day. Yes, I'm a redhead and finally proud of it and embrace that fact. Yes, I'm sassy at times, who isn't?

But to have someone say that to me that at first kind of worried me then, it I had me looking at myself through my posts. Okay, so my friend see's me how she see's me, I can't help or change that. It's her opinion and view. So what? I also know she is going through a lot of crap and her feelings are her feelings, I'm not here to judge or validate. I just support and let her deal with it how she chooses to deal with it. I have no idea what it is like to go through what she is going through. But I'm not going to judge because this attitude and behavior are not normal for my friend. But the one year anniversary of her husband's death was just earlier this week. Very, very hard, no doubt. She was not herself yesterday at all. Am I concerned about her, you bet? But it is her way of dealing and she could just be having a hard time right now. And she has every right to.

We've all read the posts or seen the photos or rants that some people post on social media who are having a bad day or things are not going right. We've all been there. It's just how life goes. But I don't judge unless it is happening all the time. Then I get a little concerned. But everyone deals with and see's thing differently. How I'd do something I know is not how the next person would do it. It is what it is. That's life.

So for today, I'm going take what my friend said with a grain of salt. Text her later to check on her and say a prayer that today is a better day for her and that life shows her some sunshine rather than rain.

If I don't like or care for what someone says or posts on social media I usually laugh at the stupidity, then either keep scrolling or hide it so I don't have to see it again. It's just social media-it's not the gospel truth and if I've learned anything in life is that you can't believe everything you read or hear.

Just checking up...

I really, really dislike when someone checks up on me, in most cases (that's my disclaimer here!). I'm an adult. I do adult kinds of things like work a job, run a house, and all the fun things that go along with being an adult. I'm pretty dull and routine.

I seldom stray from the norm and so when I do get "checked on" it irritates me at times! Today I helped a coworker for about 10 minutes deliver items from a school fundraising project during my "free period". We did what we needed to do and got back to work. It's a busy time of year, we need the room in our work area so these items had to go. Well, low and behold when we came back there was a sales person waiting for my coworker...and when I went to get water one of our school sectaries stuck her head out the office door and asked if the sales person had found my coworker. I nodded and THEN she added in a very snarky and snotty tone, "the next time you both leave, you need to let me know." Are you kidding me? This was the first and only time this had happened all school year (170 days so far!) that we were both gone-working, doing work related work. Give me a break. For Pete's sake! I think I kept myself from rolling my eyes but I did turn around and walked away-rude I know but she had no business talking to me in that way or tone. She's not my boss and I'm aware she is dong her job, but you DO NOT talk to coworkers like that. Ever! So what would happen if we both went to the restroom at the same time? She probably would have had the same snarky tone and conversation. Get over yourself already.

I dislike people asking me a lot of questions or needing to know my business or where I am or what I'm doing. Usually, for the main reason, this irritates me is I'm not doing or going any place exciting or important so why or who wants to know?! For Pete's sake, my life is boring. And there are times that what I'm doing is crap no one else acts like they know how to do, wants to do or just plain ignores. It's not like I'm going to flee the country or something! Am I a flight risk?!

I don't care about other people's business, and I know sometimes I ask questions I should not but it's purely out of a) stupidity or b) I'm concerned. I don't want to know other people's business. I don't want to be involved unless they want to involve me. The less that people know the better life is for me and others! Too often the people who complain about other people knowing their business are usually the first to have their nose in someone else's business! And they wonder why or get upset when people talk about them! This makes me laugh!

But there are, and always will be those people in our lives who will ask or want to know. My theory is "if it's not my news to tell, then I'm not gonna tell you". Plain and simple!

I have another coworker/friend who always wants to know who or what we are talking about whenever we are together or with other people or in a group setting. For a while, people would humor this person and answer her nosey questions, but now I can tell they find it darn right annoying and typically ignore her. I hate it when people ignore others or me! I try not to do this to other people, everyone wants to feel listened to, involved and included. But sometimes people are just annoying or rude.

I like to fly under the radar, so to speak, or as I jokingly told a friend not too long ago I like to be in stealth mode!

So for the rest of today, my coworker and I are being kind of snotty and poking fun at our accountability! We both know we were working and doing nothing wrong. It's just that some people think that everyone else's business is their business as well. If you can't find someone don't get your panties in a wad!

So I'm going into stealth mode to finish off my day and laugh at the nosey people of the world! I figure if people want me to know, they'll tell me!

Rainy days and Mondays and things that drive me nuts!

It's a rainy Monday and for some, it probably is depressing. But a little thunder and lightning keeps you awake and on your toes! But we are not in charge of the weather and the sun will shine again. It's not all bad!

What I want to get at are my two biggest pet peeves! Ya' know the things that drive you absolutely NUTS!!! I will admit it changes on occasion but over the weekend I think I narrowed it down to the two that will get me irritated immediately. And don't laugh, well you can but just admit we all have those "things" that drive us nuts and get on our nerves. I know I've mentioned these before but like I said these are the two finalists!! For me, at least!


1. Loose toilet seats. I'm pretty sure this probably affects more females than males. But it is the worse feeling in the world (okay it ranks up there with going to the bathroom in the dark and the last male in the bathroom didn't put the toilet seat down-that is a rude, cold and wet awakening!). But it is an awful feeling as you are sitting there, exposed to the world and you are just trying to do your business when all of a sudden everything shifts, slides, moves and you feel like you are falling. It is less than a split second of wondering if you are going to fall and there you are exposed, a worse nightmare! It drives me nuts. And scares the poo out of me! (yes pun intended!) There should be full-time positions where people just go around to both public and private at-home bathrooms and tighten or replace those toilet seats that offer these "free rides". It is not fun. Honestly, I think I have one that is turning into one of these "free rides" right now! It must get fixed or replaced!

2. People who stand around or sit watching someone else work drives me nuts. Really? Can you NOT find anything else to do with yourself? It's not like you are a supervisor or a foreman making sure people are doing their job or doing it right. I grew up in a house where you HELPED. You either asked or offered. You did not sit or stand around and watch someone else working. If you are able bodied why do you do this???? What kind of person does this? It will tick me off in 1/100th of a second. No doubt. To me, it is rude and disrespectful. OFFER or ASK to help out or leave is the safest alternative to do if you are not going to help. This will ruin a good mood  for me faster than you can blink. I'll leave the room to avoid hurting someone.

Everyone has pet peeves of some kind that drive them nuts. And I feel like everyone's pet peeves are valid, it can range from those drivers who do not use their blinkers or forget to turn their blinkers off and drive for miles down the road or how the toilet paper unrolls off the roll to how someone chews or having someone breathe on you, these are just examples!! It's okay to have pet peeves, it just makes us human! No one is perfect!!

The rain will stop and the sun will stop, if not today, then tomorrow or the next day or sometime soon! It's a Monday and life goes on!

The best job ever!

If you love your job you are a very lucky and blessed person. I love my job, and I've been at for 28+ years. I'm talking about my job of being a mom. But actually it's not a job, it is my life. There is nothing better in this world than being a mom or parent (gender does not matter!). It is the best thing ever!

I remember going to church, alone, very, pregnant 28-years ago and sitting there as they asked the moms at the end of mass to stand for a mother's blessing. I got to stand! This was a happy moment for me.

The previous year I sat during that same blessing, broken hearted because my first baby had died before they ever had the chance to live the previous fall. I was supposed to be pregnant, waiting...instead, I sat empty and sad. But in the May of 1988,  I was very-pregnant and excited and scared...Ryan Randall would not arrive for a couple of more weeks but I was anxious to meet this baby.

I endured an extremely HOT summer the next year when baby number two was on their way, Ashlyn Marie arrived on a day when it was 104-degree outside. August in Iowa is not pregnancy friendly weather! I think I knew that this baby was a girl before she ever got here, call it mother's intuition!

And finally baby number three woke me around 3 a.m. on the morning of my birthday and made his arrival a little over four hours later...I had a birthday buddy, Ranen William! The best birthday gift ever, except for the year I got a new baseball glove when I was ten...I'm kidding!! : )

Motherhood is a learning experience daily if not hourly! I kid you not! I've usually winged it or punted. Kids don't come with an owners manual nor are they ever the same from one to the next. Each one is unique and different. And that is what I love about my kids, they are great people, talented in different ways. I am fiercely protective and proud of them all. And will love them to my last breath on this earth. No one else has heard my heartbeat from the inside. And one of the coolest things is hearing your baby's heartbeat for the first time when you are pregnant or seeing that baby on the ultrasound for the first time...best thing ever! It makes it all real.

Here are just a few thoughts on motherhood that I've LEARNED from my kids:
1. No matter how hard to try to hide the cookies, someone will find them and then you have to act surprised. Yes, my kids found my hidden double stuff Oreos!
2. I love to read to my kids. I read to them before they were born and continued long after they were born. It gave us 'me time".
3. Each of your children will turn out differently and have different talents and personalities. I love all the difference.s And cringe when they have some of their mother's likenesses! Sorry, you can't help what you are born with!
4. You can't choose your relatives but I would choose all three of my kids as friends and people I'd want to know and have in my life if they were not my own children.
5. Take time to do the fun things...the unplanned...or do nothing. I'm thankful my kids did not grow up entirely during this time of social media. They still got to be kids. Appreciate the small things and moments, this is where the best memories come from usually.
6. I'm thankful my kids got to know ALL their grandparents. This was a life feature I did not get so I had no idea what I was missing. It was fun to watch and see my kids experience because I had no idea what it was like.
7. Do not compare your kids to one another. (although I'm betting I did this at times-sorry!) I was compared, unintentionally to my older siblings at times. But I survived and grew up to be my own person. Everyone is unique.
8. The juice from the stem of a dandelion will stain clothing, but it does not matter when a two-year-old is handing you a handpicked bouquet they picked just for you!
9. If you are hair challenged you get someone who is not challenged to style your daughter's hair for dance recital!
10. Sharing your birthday with one of your children guarantees that at least one of your kids won't forget your birthday!
I could go on and on with life lessons I learned from my kids as their mom over the years but that could go on forever. I just know I've learned as much about life from them as I hope I've helped them learn!

I'll close out this Friday of Mother's Day weekend with a poem that I have always been fond of and it has always reminded me that my kids are a gift, every single day...even on the days when things didn't go well or they were sick, or naughty or struggling or just not the best. We survived and still love each other.

This is my last mother's day with three kids as that number will double by this time next year. This is exciting and no doubt will mean double the fun and love! Thank you, Ryan, Ashlyn and Ranen for all you've taught me and for giving me the honor of being your mom-you are all three truly gifts from God, the best gifts ever. You are all great adults! Love you!

I'll Lend You A Child

by Edgar Guest"I'll lend you for a little time a child of mine,"  He said.
For you to love - while he lives
And mourn for when he's dead.
It may be six or seven years
Or twenty-two or three,
But will you, till I call him back,
Take care or him for Me?
He'll bring his smiles to gladden you,
And should this stay be brief
You'll have his lovely memories as solace for your grief.
I cannot promise he will stay,
Since all from earth return,
But there are lessons taught down there
I want this child to learn.
I've looked this world over
In search for teachers true,
And from the throngs that crowd
Life's lanes, I have selected you.
Now will you give him all your love,
Nor count the labor vain,
Nor hate Me when I come to call to
Take him back again?"
I fancied that I heard then say,
"Dear Lord, Thy will be done,
For all the joy Thy child shall bring,
The risk of grief we'll run.
We'll shelter him with tenderness,
We'll love him while we may,
And for the happiness, we've known
Forever grateful stay.
But should the angels call for him
Much sooner than we've planned,
We'll brave the bitter grief that come
And try to understand."

Things that make you go hummmmmm.......

Have you ever had some really strange or just plain crazy things happen that make you laugh??
Today must be the day for that as the weird and odd are happening and it just makes me shake my head, laugh, and wonder "what the heck???".

-The teacher who has accounting students watching "Shawshank Redemption" because the main character was an accountant as part of her class curriculum!
-The student who doesn't get to go on a field trip because he habitually does something he should not and he did it again yesterday....so when he found out he could not go on the trip today he had a fit, was throwing things in the principals office and had to be sent home.
-The coworker who resigned from her job last week and emptied her classroom and her office of all her personal belongs yesterday, but we have 20+ days left of work.
-The coworker who has been "let go" of her job two months ago and still thinks she has a shot at another position within the district.
-The kids who giggle, laugh and talk constantly and when you call them out on it, they look at you like you've just kicked a puppy and give you the "who me?" look.
-The athlete who was told practice and camp would be the first two weeks in June and then proceeds to email after you email out dates and info that they will be gone....
-The opportunity to out-smart two students who thought they were being funny and you prank their prank!!
-The car horn going off in the student parking lot and the kids don't mind it!
-The teacher who borrows a computer charging cord and assured me they'd return it yesterday and because it is one of the last two and have not returned yet today I have to go ask for it and I'm made to feel like I'm being mean and unfair.
-How peaceful lunch is when you don't have to eat with two negative Nancy's who are usually in the room. That made my day!
-The student who insists on standing the entire period with his headphones on, "Just because"! He was at least quiet.
-The teachers who are told not to let athletes go early but to wait for the announcement to release them but STILL lets them go early.
-The athletes who think they are special or their failure to plan gives them an excuse to leave early! Nope!!


It's Thursday and as things get weird and wacky as the school year winds down we should be used to this but it never ceased to surprise me the crazy, stupid, wild things that go on with working with kids and some adults. Find humor in the day and remember it's just one day, tomorrow is a new one!