Do no harm, take no s^!#

There is a fine line between standing up for yourself and being a b!#ch. There also is a wise-ness of picking your battles. There are people who think they've gotten the best of me or a situation or have "won" because I've walked away or said nothing. But they are very wrong. Some things or people just aren't worth my time and energy. And I'm finding more and more people and situations are not worth my time as life goes on.

But one thing I won't ever get or understand is mean people. Why? Is it something you learned at home? Are or were your parents mean and nasty people? Why?

I don't get or understand the people who set up, make, watch and take great joy in watching people fail. They do everything they can to make it happen. Why? What is wrong with you? What makes these kinds of people so mean, nasty and vindictive? Does it make them feel better about themselves? I keep going back to "it was how they were raised" and blaming their parent/parents or lack there of. Their 'home" life must be pretty awful. Plus this is what must being taught at home-well they learning it some place, I'm just saying.

We've all had or been a witness to the "friend who is absolutely nothing but trouble". I think most people have had one or two during their life-a wrong choice. These are friends who do nothing but bring out the bad in us, teach us bad things and make us do bad things. I've witnesses these kinds of friends with my own kids over the years. You keep a close eye. Watch carefully and pray-a lot. You can't say anything because you know it will come back and smack you in the face and it usually just propels them towards the wrong person even more. So you just wait, and watch. And sooner or later, for good or bad, people come to their senses-usually. But what is left behind is usually not good. Either bad habits are learned and repeated. Or there is the aftermath of these so called friendships-relationships damaged or changed forever. It's life. A lesson.

I remember my mom coming right out and telling me that she didn't like a friend I had in junior high school. Mom said my current friend at the time, Christy, was not a good friend nor did she make good choices. I was hurt but it didn't stop me from being friends with Christie-one of my few rebel moments of life I guess. Mom kept close tab on my "phone time" with Christie at home and I think I got to have her over once but was never allowed to go to her house. But mom could not control our time together or behavior at school. I got in trouble for small things in class a few times because of Christie and then I started to realize what my mom meant. My friendship with Christie was short lived and she finally transferred to public school and got pregnant in high school and from there I have no idea what happened to her. Mom was right and I innocently learned how to make better choices in friends. I have no idea how or why Christie and I because friends in the first place. But I learned how to make better choices and how not to be one of "those" friends in life.

Unfortunately in life, work and family you get the mean and bully kind of people who do no good and are bad news all the way around. You can't avoid them when they are members of your family, a coworker or a neighbor. You deal. You avoid. And you keep moving along. Unfortunately, these mean bullies often times seem hell bent on being jerks-its their way of life, they know no other way. My goal has always been to avoid these people, protect myself and those I love or mean a great deal to me and eliminate the negativity of these people. And another thing I've learned is if you get rid of one of these kinds of people there is always another one just like them, right behind them to take their place. Life is filled with mean people. How you react or if you do fuels their fire and gives them power.

So I guess my stand on those who are hell bent on making someones life hell or causing problems is to do exactly as this blog is titled: Do no harm, take no shit. I will stand up for the under dog, or for someone who needs my help or support against the bully or mean behavior. I always have and I hope I always will take a stand and support regardless if it is an adult friend or a student. I did it as a kid and as an adult, and I will continue to do so BUT....I will not do it in a mean manner. I will not stoop to the level of those who are being mean and a bully. If we don't help each other we are letting the bullies win. There is power in numbers.

I guess the phrase "do no harm, take no shit" is a good way to look at and deal with life. It is a positive way to deal with the ups and downs in life. It is a positive way to turn around a negative situation! There are no winners or losers in this thing called life...in the end we all die. The best legacy we can leave behind is good memories and the ability to make people smile when they think of us. Do no harm, take no shit.

Positive thought of the day: May your day be bully free! But remember to "Do no harm, take no shit"!