Wake up!!!

This blog is addressed to ANYONE who has, will or is currently living with someone. Regardless if it is a spouse, significant other, parents or siblings but primarily if that other person is a FEMALE,
this is a reminder that just like you, your "room mate" works at a job and/or goes to school and/or does something outside the home at least 8 hours a day, five days or more a week. I typically work outside the home over 40 hours a week. The key phrase here is OUTSIDE the home. I then work my other job as soon as I step foot in my house and I work this other job seven days a week, 365 days a year, 52 weeks a year, 24 hours a day when I'm not at my job outside the home-do you get where I'm going with this? (I also work two other part time jobs, coaching and the newspaper as well. Or and there is some of the yard work and snow removal that I do too.)

I've came to the conclusion that some people in this world do not know the  following (or have forgotten)-so READ and LEARN or please take note for future reference-(if) you need it-Learn this while you're young:

-where milk comes from or where to go BUY some more without being told. It is found at a place called the grocery store, in the refrigerator section-near the beer. Buy 2 gallons so you don't run out so quick. It's that E-A-S-Y! Yes!!!!
-HOW to change a toilet paper roll or where to purchase more-as it must magically appear as soon as we run low-the TP fairy drops it down the chimney! (I wish). TP is usually located not too far away from the milk section at the grocery store. When the roll is empty change it. Oh and by the way if the toilet needs to be cleaned just do it! You can find what you need to clean it very close by usually. Just do it!! Surprise your room mate and be considerate.
-If you use it up- write it down on a grocery list so more can be bought. Telling someone who is doing a half-dozen other things is not always a sure fire way to deal with this situation, and it may not be remembered. Ask if there is a grocery list. This is not hard as most 1st graders know how to read and write. Or get what you used up-replacing it and be an all-star room mate!!!
-Wash your dishes/ rinse them so we do not start an ant farm or some other kind of nasty bug infestation or worse yet the place STINKS. It does not take a degree in engineering to figure this out. I was "helping" wash dishes when I was 4 years old (yes it was mainly to play in the water but regardless it taught me how.) Just WASH them and put them away either after drying them or after they air dry, meaning within an hour-don't live out of your dish drainer-yuck.
-If you make a mess clean it up! If you are going to let things soak, then do so for 20 minutes, go back and clean up. Letting things "soak" or I'll clean it up later which is still a mess 3-days later is not good-it's gross and rude and a sure fire way to make your "room mate" unhappy.  Just clean up after yourself. 
-When the garbage is full or worse SMELLS- take it out!!! It does not magically only get full on garbage day-good grief. It's good weight lifting too.
-if it belongs to you or you put it down or drop it- PICK IT UP and here's a tough one...PUT IT AWAY.
-there are two neat gadgets that you need to get acquainted with, one is called the washing machine and the other equally cool one is called a dryer. These are used to wash YOUR clothes in and dry them. They too do not magically wash, dry, fold, make their way up the stairs or put themselves away. If you wear it you wash it or at least help out.
-Think about what is on the bottom of your shoes-ya know all the crap that you step in/on outside the house? Yuck! Yuck! Yuck! Well when you walk around the house with your shoes on you bring that crap INSIDE. TAKE OFF your shoes and put them on as you are leaving. It is not a hard concept just think about the shit you are dragging in and guess what it means---- more cleaning when you do this kind of crap. 
--I've yet to see a self cleaning house. Vacuum/sweep/dust/clean a toilet/clean a sink (any of these) just once in a while and do it just because, not because someone is coming over or your "room mate" is pissed because you've done nothing but watch tv and sit on your butt for the past 8 hours while she has ran around like a nut trying to get things done. Or better yet, make it a habit! Things routinely get cleaned probably on a weekly basis by the other person who does not get to come home every evening, sit, have a meal cooked for them and then cleaned up and put away, even on those days when they don't feel like it-they still do it. They also probably are doing a host of other things while cooking like cleaning, laundry and taking care of other household chores too numerous to mention. You help make it dirty, help keep it clean.
-If you are the last one eating put the food away and wash your dishes. Food sitting out all night is no longer good for consumption. Nothing puts me in a happy mood than having to come back and put food away 4 hours after I made it or doing supper dishes the next morning because I cleaned up the night before but it was too much work for someone to get things out to the kitchen when things are being cleaned up.) That's just a dandy way to end or start my day-NOT.
-Think about guests when you have them-if you are eating or drinking something then ask and offer your guest a drink or food...it's just damn rude to eat in front of guests without offering and asking them first. Have a little decorum and manners. And finally don't just walk off and go to bed when you have guests-were you born in a barn? Plain and simple manners.

This is just my advice to you in plain and simple terms: WAKE the heck up!!  I mean this in a kind way but come on. We are not living in the 1900's where the women did everything in the home BUT did not work outside the home-home was their work. Yes I know very well it is stressful to work and go to school and there are a ton of demands -we all have it, but you live in the house/apartment/condo/hut/tent too-do your share. If everyone does their part, helps out and is responsible then life can be enjoyed not spent working or living in your work 24/7. It is not fun to have your feet hit the floor every morning and you are immediately at work. Or to have every day going from one job to another with little or no help.

If I've heard my father in-law say it once, I've heard him say it several dozen times, that he did not realize all the work his wife did at home after she worked outside the home all day for years and while raising kids. It now takes several adults to keep that house some what operational-she worked her butt off, and now after she is gone, it is noticed-sad. 

Okay, I'm done with my tirade but take this as friendly advice, life at home is a lot better if you just do your share and be an active room mate rather than acting like a lazy, rude guest.

Positive thought of the day: More like advice-be a good room mate, go pick up or vacuum, take out the garbage or do the dishes for your "room mate" -life will be a lot better for both of you.   

Never stop

This may sounds like an odd thing to do but just for kicks I went to Pinterest and challenged myself to find the first saying that clicked with me and use it to motivate for my day and my blog so here it is.....

And....well this is pretty much just good practice. I'm sure there are dozens of ways to do this and show the people you care about how much you do care. We tend to take for granted and often forget how important those we love and care about are to us. We are so use to them that we just don't think about them or show them how much they mean. And we all forget to continue to show them what they mean until they are gone or something "wakes us up".
We need to remember that our loved ones are gifts from God, and you never know when that gift will be called home.
For me this is my family and a few good friends...you mean the world to me! And I hope you know how much you do mean to me.

Positive thoughts...love the sound of nature. Today that is the rain and a gentle thunderstorm.

Life lessons from a kitten

Who would think that as an adult I'd learn and be reminded of simple lessons in life from a small kitten? I certainly did not, nor did I realize that until last night. So despite this kitten spending a short four days in my house he touched my life and heart, he taught me lessons and reminded me not to take for granted the simple things in life.

1. Be friendly, say hello and if you need to be loud, do it! Meow as loud as you can or need to!
2. Eat what you want to eat!
3. Explore. Get out there is see what is around you. Do not be afraid!
4. Climb to new heights! Dig your claws in and just go for it.
5. Do not be afraid to show people that you love them. Get up there and hug and tell them.
6. Sleep when you can but enjoy life and don't miss out.
7. Keep trying even when you don't succeed.
8. Love life. Purr every day!
Thanks for the reminders and lessons little guy. You are missed!

One small positive: The birds that start singing bright and early. We are so fortunate to have them and their beautiful songs. They start each day with a song. We need to do that too.

What July means to me

Here we are to the month of July...over halfway through the year. People say that after the 4th it is all downhill and that school is right around the corner...ugh! Several people have birthdays in July. My daughter was suppose to be born in July, the 28th, but she held out and chose August as her  birth month.
I was suppose to be born in July, the 4th but I showed up a month and a day earlier than planned. Instead my oldest niece was born on the 4th. I was the ripe old age of 7 years old when she was born. A few things about her arrival made an impression on me.
My neighbor growing up was born the 3rd of July, the year before I was born and her name is Lynn Marie too.
My uncle passed away on the 4th of July, and I remember details of the night before and morning of his passing even now and I was just a 4th grader. I have no idea why his death left an impression. It might be because he was the first person close to me to pass away, I'm not sure.
The 4th of July holds lots of great memories for me otherwise. My dad and brothers making the trip down to Missouri to bring home illegal fireworks and all the fun we had with them! (except the one time my mom was goofing around and thought she'd play a trick on my dad or brother and toss a firecracker as they started the pickup and thinking it was back firing. Instead the firecracker had a short fuse and her thumb was injured. She took it in stride and spoke of it years later with a laugh as the trick was on her instead of them). We always had a picnic on the 4th and either shot off our own fireworks or watched the ones from Independence in the evening. Great memories.
The 4th of July was, and probably still one of my favorite holidays, it does not require a lot of work, no shopping for presents and the menu can change by whatever the cook wanted to make. No holiday shopping for items to keep traditions. No 4th of July outfits like at Christmas or Easter. It could be burgers or steaks on the grill or whatever you want. You eat outside and relax and spend the day as you like.
Independence, IA has a great parade, I rode my horse in it a couple of times. It is a real parade with floats, and bands and all the things that a real parade has, usually lasting well over an hour. I still miss the Independence 4th of July parade and it has been years since I've seen it. 
So as busy as life is as this month starts I have fond memories and lots of special people who celebrate this month of their birth!
Here's to hoping it is a good month, full of lots of blessing, happy memories and time spent with great people.

Positive thought of the day: What beautiful weather we finally have. It has not rained in 24-hours, it has cooled off and less humidity and the best of all the sun is shining. : )

What does it matter!

No I'm not asking the question "What does it matter?" as the title of today's post. It's my explanation- "What does it matter!".  Let me back track. It's been a rather nutty morning juggling between being home alone for a couple of days, cat and house sitting, working as a stringer for the local newspaper and trying to finish things up at school. So with all of this I was arriving at school around 9 a.m., an hour later than I wanted but I had everything else off of my list so it has been a productive morning so far (I probably just jinxed that!). Anyway as I made my way down the hallway, I was greeted by a coworker who I see on occasion. I made the mistake on commenting on how nice the hallway floors looked and I was met by 2 minutes of complaining, swearing, more complaining and more swearing about one of their coworkers, all while trying to get my door unlocked and escape the negative tirade! The guy just needed someone to vent to,  (I understand that and we all need an ear at times to vent, bitch and get it out. I do a lot!) I listened and when he finally took a breath, I briefly said that I was sorry his day and situation with the coworker was not going well. That I hoped it got better and again told him how nice the school was looking for all his hard work. I think I caught him off guard with my reply and he mumbled a "thank you" and went on his way. He just needed someone to vent to, however briefly it was. And I was not jumping on his bitching party bus but rather express my feelings that things were going that way BUT I appreciated and NOTICED what he was doing and how nice it looked. The end! Move on!
I got busy on work in my office and work area and I'd forgotten the conversation and the anger and frustration with the individual, it was typical behavior, unfortunately. We all have our triggers and moments.
It wasn't until I was killing some time sorting and going through some things while waiting for computer  software to finish downloading when I ran across a card from one of my high school dance team girls thanking me for listing and supporting her while she and her younger sister were having issues. And my earlier school greeting of frustration by that coworker came back to me. What does it matter!
I'm sure for the young lady who wrote me the card of thanks several months ago the problems have been resolved, dealt with and forgotten. I'd like to think she learned some life lessons from the experience but right now I know of doubt it. At the time it mattered a great deal to her. And it should have, no one wants or should be bullied. And I'm sure the tirade and venting that I was treated to this morning is long forgotten and I'm betting the individual was probably disappointed by my reaction and lack of band wagon jumping on! But he just needed to uncork his frustrations with a situation and move on....I hope!
We all have our "moments" where we let something that on most days don't even cause us to have a second thought hit us wrong at times. This is normal and this is part of being human. Even the most passive people have a nerve hit at times. And later,  I'd like to think, most of us look back and think "what was that?" or  Why did I let "that" bother and get to me? Hard to say!
But you know what? Life goes on. For some they stew and brew on something that may seem trivial to others but is a major source of irritation and unhappiness for them. Others just deal and move on. And there are those brave few who deal with the source of their unhappiness and frustration-good for them, IF they do it in a non-relationship harming way. Be brave-I am not!
I'm typically a keep my mouth shut and keep moving kind of person. I KNOW I'd feel better if I addressed the source of my frustrations and let it out. I have a heavy duty filter, unlike others who speak then think. But wisdom and experience has taught me to keep my mouth shut, move on and let it go, for the time being and deal with it myself. And there are those very rare times when I have stood up for myself and told someone how I felt. I just did that recently and I stood and still stand alone- without any friend support. I have no support from those around me, but they had not walked in my shoes, they have no idea what I was dealing with. It's a lonely walk and I've dealt with a variety of feelings but the fact that I'm not being walked on and treated as unimportant has made it worth the pain. I walked away from something I was passionate about and worked hard to make successful despite a "friend" who left me out of the loop and often times I was the last to know or be informed. That's not fun. That's not how you work with others-especially when you are working on the same project and cause. We're on the same team here! I'm not sure why some people feel the need to walk all over others. Is it an ego thing? A control factor for them? Or are they so self absorbed that they think only THEY can do it right. Of course people aren't going to do it the way you think they should. But they also aren't going to even attempt to do it the way you think it should be done if you don't tell them everything that it involves-share the information and edcation. I always silently cheer inside when someone goes above and beyond and does a better job, or does things a better way than anyone else thought of. Way to go!
So if you are bothered by something or someone today ask yourself my favorite four questions of: Will it matter in day? Will it matter in a week? Will it matter in a month? Or will it matter in a year? IF it does still bother you in a day, week, month or year, then it is important to you. Deal with it, come to terms and move on. Life is too short.

Positive thought of the day: Life is quiet and uneventful, which is a good thing to have!

A new direction

Every time I've sent my kids out the door my heart is always a bit sad to see them go and I look so forward to them coming home! From staying at Grandpa and Grandma's on the other side of the state as little people, to all the first days of school, then heading to college, new jobs and new places. The funny thing is they've usually headed east! East to camp, to college, to a first job. Until today. Ryan is taking his life a new direction so to speak. And this is something that has been on his radar for many months. He's going after a dream and that is wonderful. He's going west!

I've watched as all my kids have went after dreams and worked hard to achieve them. From auditioning for All-Iowa Dance Team to making it to the state track meet to getting a masters degree and hopefully doing something they love. And it is wonderful to watch! To them I say thank you, for being brave, for working hard and getting back up when life has knocked you down and working your butt off! They've kept their dreams alive and continued to dream-I hope they always do.

I remember how sad my mom always looked each time I left home, be it to head back to college, or loading up my three lively kids and going back to my house. I always had mixed emotions with the experience. My heart ached to leave my mom, and then to leave her alone after dad was gone, then to leave her in the care facility where she was living. My heart ached but often times I had  regret for not living closer or anger for her making it so hard to leave! But how lucky I was to have a mom who cared so much and made it hard to leave. I miss her every single day. No I would not have wanted to live with my parents! Nor would I want my kids all living at home as adults-we'd drive each other crazy....how limited their dreams would be if they still were. But how blessed I am to have these three and how much they have taught and continue to teach me and the adventures they take me on!

So today is the start of a new chapter and adventure not just for Ryan but for all of us who love him. For with him he not only takes along as many things as he can fit in his car and his bike on the back. But all of our love, support and prayers for nothing but the best. Even though nine hours seems like a lot, yes I was spoiled when everyone was less than two hours away, but this is not that far and it is not thousands and thousands of miles away. I always miss my kids when they are gone but I am so blessed that they want to go out into the world, explore, learn and live. And that they do come back home.
Love to all three....but I still miss you more than you know. After all you grew under my heart, you know what my heart sounds like from the inside and my heart and love is always with you.

Postivie thought of the day: I am so blessed and I so appreciate that fact! Love you guys!

Life, always changing

It's Sunday, the first day of the week. It's the first day of a new month and summer has finally arrived. But like every day life is constantly changing. People are doing something new or different, new projects, new hair style, new jobs, new cities, new book, new shoes, new glasses, new classes, new anything.

Birthdays come and go and with each one you are blessed enough to mark another year on this earth. Because if you look at life from the viewpoint of you are dying every day it is kind of sad. But looking at life as you will never again be as  young as you are right now, well it makes you appreciate the time, the moment and the blessing of being alive, who you are, where you are at and all that you are blessed with.

With this month ahead we have not only three birthdays in our house but changes coming with a new job, new location and life taking not just one of us but all of us some place new. When one family member moves and goes to a new city, state or country with them a part of the rest of the family goes too. No, I'm not planning on all of us moving but visiting is definitely in the plans. The new opportunities to see new places, go some place where we've never been before is exciting and fun. But more than that is the excitement of seeing your child work, go after and reach goals they've dreamed of and wanted.

So despite a dreaded milestone birthday coming up I'm excited to see what is ahead for as I titled this blog, life is always changing. And when you are a family and one person makes a change it is a change for everyone who knows and loves that person. It may seem at times that life is dull and boring, day in and day out we plug away because we loose track and don't notice the little changes, the seasons come and go and we continue. So with life changes, big, small or whatever the size embrace them and enjoy.

Positive thought of the day: My kids who still come home to visit and see us. Maybe I didn't screw up as much as I think I have! They are really great adults who regardless where they live, what they do and how often or little they come home to visit will always be my greatest accomplishment, my mark on the world! They will never realize how much I love them until they have kids of their own!